BehindTheMedspeak: Snoring Arbitrage

The Breathe Fit™ Nasal Dilator (above and below) is all over the internet, promising relief from snoring forever.

What I find fascinating is that you can pay $29.95 for one, or $19.95, or $12.95, or $9.99.

All for an identical little piece of blue plastic — which probably costs about five cents to make — that won't work as advertised.

Amazing.

The device purports to act by "applying gentle pressure to your septum trigeminal nerve."

Huh.

Never knew that something so simple could stop snoring.

Maybe that's because it can't, won't, and doesn't.

Ya think?

If you'd like to try putting pressure on your "septum trigeminal nerve" but would prefer not to spend a bundle doing so, you might want to consider a much older iteration, developed by cliff drivers in millenia past and brought up to 21st-century snuff by Speedo, Arena, Tyr, and a host of other makers of swimming accessories.

Simply take one of their inexpensive nose clips ($2.50–$3.99)

and put it inside

instead of outside your nostrils.

Ah, how peaceful.

What is the sound of no one snoring?